Tuesday, April 9, 2013

go for it

I woke up this morning determined to really pursue getting a new job which basically means going to all these fancy smancy department stores...putting in my resume and hoping someone bites.

I went to Saks and felt really inadequate. People smiled at me and I saw a few familiar faces but I just didn't feel right. My friends who are freelancers gave me some tips to help me...y'know...what to say, what to do...where to go...and I felt a little bit better. I went to Nars and dropped off my resume and then hightailed it out of there!

All 3 people that I spoke to in Saks was like...GO TO MAC! What's wrong with you?
And while that's really where I wanted to be...I don't know, I felt like I had to go to all these other places first.

I was in the area, passing by and so I went in to MAC and the first girls I ran into was like.."Oh what MAC do you work at?"

I don't work at MAC, I just wanted to put my app in..the manager looked at me and said, WOW! He didn't have any openings but told me who does and I ran over there. The response was awesome.

I felt really good about it.
I should expect a call about an interview in a week or so.

I have no idea what I was thinking...I want to work for MAC, so I'm going to stick it out until I can.
Point blank.

Things are good with The Frenchman. I feel so secure and relaxed. I know he likes me. I believe him when he says he wants to be with me for a while. We talked about communication and he's working on it. We'll see where it goes..things are super mellow. I feel the difference when someone wants to rush things but it feels like we're taking our time.

Friday, April 5, 2013

real or game?

me and the frenchman was supposed to go on a date but trouble struck at his job and he didn't get home til 11. he asked to see me that late. me being the savvy lady i am said for him to meet me at work for lunch tomorrow or sunday, i'm off. he's off.

he danced around for a bit and said he'd probably see me for lunch. sunday is his day to sleep all day. he says it's the one day for himself. i get it. i've known him a week. i'm not trying to make him change his life...but, eventually...sundays are going to be mine...*evil laugh*

i think he's infatuated by me...he thinks i'm beautiful and smart and he wants another "taste" but he keeps reminding me that he doesn't just wasnt 1 night or just a sexual relationship. he's told me so much that it isn't reassuring me...it's making me question.

  and i don't want to do that..overthink things.

but, i don't want to get my hopes up and get all starry eyed because i don't think i can handle another disappointment. i want to protect my heart but i don't want to be jaded.

what do i do?

i hate all this damn uncertainty