Tuesday, September 30, 2008


He held me close. He kissed my face. He kissed my neck and held me around the middle where I've gained a couple of pounds, but I knew it was ok.

We fell asleep close to 6:15a.


We got up the next day hungry and happy. We sat on my couch watching Wanted on DVD. I saw him texting and I'm sure I saw the name, "My baby."

My heart sank.

I looked him dead in the eyes, Do you have a girlfriend?



I wish you wouldve told me that before...

He was silent. The movie was over. Time for him to go.

Are you still coming over to eat tonight.

I paused.

Sure. Let me know what time.

I will call you maad early. I fell asleep. I woke up at 7pm(!!!!!!)

I text(ed) him.

Oh we're about to eat now.

I was pissed.

Gee, thanks...


If I go, I'm not going to get there til 9.


I sat there pondering what I should do. I surmised that I wanted answers. I was pissed and I needed someone to vent my anger at. I got there a little before 9 to find his family had just finished Scategories. That's my game! Arrgh!

He fixed me a plate and I waited for them to finish.

I think we should talk, I said.

Like in-depth?


We walked outside.

To be continued....
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For Colored Girls, When Love is not Enough

I was going to name this "Fairytale Endings," but I got inspired by Eb's blog to change the name...

Its been a hell of a ride for me and Afroman. I can truly say that I love him to death and he loves me.

Without further beating around the bush, it could only be better if I had written it myself.

What I'm trying to say is:

Afroman and I are

Still not together.

Because fairy tales are fictional stories told to children to woo them to sleep.

I've been so preoccupied with our ball that I hadn't really had time to myself at all. So, when he called on Saturday night asking if I could come hang out with him and his family, I was thrilled but exhausted. I got it together and went all the way up to 145 St. I got there at 11:30 and the party was in full swing. I was nervous about meeting his sister. I'm good with dudes, but sometimes chicks just don't like me. His sis took to me like a duck to water and we laughed and joked it up the majority of the night. Plus, it didn't hurt that I'm the queen of Taboo and our team killed it.

It was 3:45 when we left Afroman's brother's house. I was not going home by myself. Afroman, ever the gentleman, offered to come with me. We got to my house and started watching a movie. He was kissing my forehead, rubbing my leg telling me how beautiful I am. I got up. I know AM, I know what the look in eye meant.

I was straightening up (see last post about my house....eek) and he came up behind me. He was ummm...poking me and kissing me on my neck. He grabbed me and turned me around and kissed me. We went to my bedroom. He took off my shorts. He rubbed me. I can't see 'em but I like these panties.

They're pink lacy boyshorts. I laughed.

He hovered on top of me kissing me deeply. His hands wandering all over. You're so soft. He nuzzled his head in my neck. He took off my shirt. He kissed my breasts. He licked down my stomach and worked his way down. He pulled off my underwear. He grabbed my ass. He licked and sucked at my clit.

He buried 2 fingers inside. He kissed my labia. He remembered all the things I liked.

I pulled him up and he plowed inside of me. Kissing all over me.

I missed you.

Ummm...deja vu?

He pinched my nipples and kissed my lips.

Then....he went limp.

Must be the drinks, he said.

I turned him over and kissed his member. I slid my tongue up and down his shaft and in one swift movement I put the whole thing in and let his cock hit the back of my throat.

He moaned. His favorite move.

I moved my head up and down in slow motion, just the way he liked it until he pulled me up.

I'm gonna fuck you from behind.

We quickly switched positions and he slapped my ass as my head banged against the wall.

Back up before I get a concussion.

He was pounding fast and furious. He kissed my back as he smacked my ass and grabbed it with both hands. He pushed my head into the bed and went deeper.

He pushed me down into missionary and threw one of my legs over his shoulder. It was intense. I was loving it. I could tell he was in the zone when he moaned loudly and pulled out.

He was breathing hard and didn't say a word. I sat up.

Did you cum?

Yes, I did. I'm sorry.

I didn't say a word....

To be continued....
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Monday, September 29, 2008

A Little More Selfish

The last post was kind of... Angry.

I make no apologies for anything I've said on this blog. Anywho, this blog is about me and not anyone else and I'm selfish as hell. So, without more energy not being spent on me...I must get back to what really matters. ;-)

I've been really slacking on all fronts. My apartment feels sticky. Its not dirty but it just feels like I have a layer of grime. I want to scrub it from top to bottom. My bedroom is a huge gob of clothes. It really signifies where I am in my life: just messy. Being the Type A personality I am...this must not persist.

But I am exhausted.

Its the same goes with my writing career. I need to write at least 10 pages a day, everyday without exception, but I haven't written so much as a creative line in months!


This ball will be over in 3 weeks. After that,I'll have a lot more space in my brain to do all I want to do.

Also, I think I want to perfect my make-up artistry. I'm going to paint my friends and put pics up. I've been really timid lately. I need to showcase my talent more. Be on the look-out! I'm about to blow uuuuuup! Lol

But no, I want to have at least 1 good chapter, typed and edited by Thanksgiving. I want to have pictures and a pricing system up by Christmas. 2009 is going to be the ish for me!

Its time to really just be more about myself and my goals. If not me, who else is really going to care?

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Friday, September 26, 2008

Pop Off, Son!

Yada yada yada…it’s Friday

I wish I could block some mofos off my blog. Like ping your IP Address so you won’t make dumb ass comments about shit that don’t concern you. And just because you can’t get a whiff of my cat doesn’t mean you have to be so mo’fuggin bitter about shit.


Yo yo…

Shut the fuck up.

Yes. Yellow Negro..I am talking about you.

I know I am putting my shit on blast. I am airing out the intimate details of my life and that is fine. I use this space to say whatever I want to say without judgment or question. While it is my choice to write it, it is your choice to make shitty comments. You have the right to feel whatever you feel about the content here. But, I will NOT censor myself. I will NOT front. If I say I’m having a fat day. Fuck it! I feel fat today. If I say I swallowed a 9inch dick, I swallowed a 9inch dick. If you have a problem with fat days and fellatio, this is not the blog for you.


Now, that is out….

Have a great weekend.

Thursday, September 25, 2008


I admit it.

The flesh is weak and the mind remembers what it wants to. Mine remembered that it has been months since I last enjoyed the touch of man and I need some McLovin STAT.


And so...at 7pm, when Blair text me "Hello, how are you?"

I felt a flutter. And yes, I wanted to and yes we did.

Even though I got 4 hours of sleep the previous night and I will not get a decent night's sleep until Saturday night, I crept over to his house. Excitement and nervousness in my belly, wondering if it would be better or worse than it was before. Because, I've been so safe with myself.

And, I thought, better to be reckless in my 20s, seemingly carefree than whorish in my 30s, seemingly sad.

And, yes, it had everything to do with the words I whispered to myself yesterday morning, "I'm lonely."

Gi told me not to do it. She thought I was settling.

BFF said to go for it. Since her vow of celibacy 3 weeks ago, she's trying to live vicariously through me.

And so, at 11:40pm, he sent a text. Come now.

I did.

Hoping I really was holding out for the good stuff. He opened the door in his boxer briefs and wife beater - a chocolate god. He pulled me close and hugged me.

"I missed you," he whispered in my ear.

I acted like I didn't hear.

"You know the way, miss"
He grabbed my butt....."Mmmmmmmm"

His house smelled like mango-cinnamon. It was a different but nice concoction.

We got to his bedroom. I forgot how OCD clean he is.
He put on Lloyd's cd.

I sat on the bed. Take off that sweater. I obliged. He kissed me, taking off my shirt. (Why so many layers?)

"You lost weight?"

I laughed.

He undressed laying next to me. He patted the space next to him.

"Kiss me"

I leaned over and kissed him softly.

He un-hooked my bra.

"Sneaky..." I laughed.

He didn't say a word.

He got up, took off his clothes and hovered over me.


"I almost forgot how beautiful you are."

He kissed me deeply and pulled of my lacy boyshorts.
"I like," he said.
He sucked on my breasts and bit the nipple.


"Rub my dick on your clit."

"Yes...put it inside of you."

"I'm not wet, yet"

"I have something for that..."

*insert fireworks*

Brotha put it down as he lapped at the kitty cat. He was hungry.
He penetrated me, nice and slow.

"Oh my gosh...I really missed you. Pinch my nipples babe."

And, I could tell he was telling the truth. He pulled out like 4 times.

"I don't want to cum yet," he reasoned.

We feel asleep after about 1/2 hour of twists and positions and things.
I was content.

He spooned me (my fave)

His body was on fire. His heart was thumping out of his chest.

I fell asleep. Content to finally get the good stuff..

(there was other stuff, but i can't do the blow by blow)

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Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Natural Blues

I feel like I’m in a glass case and I’m struggling to break through.

Like I’m underwater with my hands tied my back sinking…no matter how much I keep beating my head against the wall, I’ll give myself a concussion rather than create change


We went to Havana Outpost which is in Downtown Brooklyn. It's hella cool. You walk in order and pay, give your receipt to a guy in a truck who makes the food and sit outside in cafeteria-like benches. The food was ok. We had chips and guacamole, chicken quesadilla, and mango slices.

It was a beautiful night and it was decorated tastefully Mexican. I don't know wtf happened, but I must've eaten an onion or something and my whole mouth was on fire, but the fire felt like it started from the back of my throat. Not good.

They have a compost station where everything has a place for dumping. Glass bottles in one spot, waste in another, paper plates somewhere else....I thought it was cool.

We hit it on the train to Bembe.
We got off the train and began walking when this guy walks up to me and asks me where the club was. I get weirded out when people come up to me in the street because that's how I got robbed the last time. Anywho, one of the girls I was with knew where it was. She was like "Follow us."

The dude was like, "Well I'm driving. Do you want a ride?"

I immediately got uncomfortable. It was one other dude in the car with him which I guess isn't so bad. She said, "Give me your phone." She held on to it and she headed to his car. BFF was with it, so I came along.

I thought it would be a lot bigger than what it was. You walk in and there's a guy drumming. It's dark and the entire bar is made of beautiful hardwood. The bathroom is co-ed stalls with the sink outside.

I was wearing tight skinny jeans with a low-cut black shirt and a belt and 2inch heels.

We went downstairs and it looked like something out of a movie. The dancefloor is not bigger than someone's living room. Everyone was dancing to the Afro-Cuban beats. It was hot and tight.
We were there for about a half-hr before we had to leave. I could feel the powder makeup I had on stinging...(That's what happens when I sweat at least)

Rochelle said she knew of a bar down the block we could go to that was a lot cooler. We went and omg...we were the only black kids in the bar. They were playing 80s music. Rochelle and BFF were having a blast. I just wanted to go home. Rochelle strikes me as the type of chick that loves to be in the mix with white people while appearing extremely Afrocentric. Like, by doing that, she's appreciated more for her "individuality" and let's face it - white people do appreciate it more. But, she was like, "Let's dance like those white people. Let's act like those white folks" (who looked like fools - happy fools) and I was like, "I'm good being myself."

And thus, my problem with the Afrocentric set - the closed-mindedness of a few. I may have a 16inch weave down my back, I'm the first in make-up and heels, but I will never say I'm trying to be white or anything that's not colored. I love being a black woman. While, surprisingly, a lot of "conscious" women I've encountered (who have the most Afrikan features) are fucked up in the head when it comes to their identity.

That's a post for another day.

Anywho...they decided they wanted to leave at around 1:30 and I was more than happy to oblige. My feet were killing me (I'd been in those heels since 8pm). We walked about 3 blocks up. Rochelle's sister finally showed up to Bembe. She wanted to go back. We walked her back (!!!!) And hopped a cab home. I was starving. BFF didn't want to stop anywhere. She was sure she had something at home. We got there and of course there was nothing. It was 2:30 am. No one was cooking anything. I ended up eating Nilla wafers with whipped cream and water.

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Monday, September 22, 2008

Save the Cheerleader Save the World

I just hung up with Afroman.

It made me realize how much I miss him.
He had to go because he was in the middle of cooking himself some dinner.

His voice was silky and smooth. Deep and warm. I remember that voice. It used to calm me in my worst hours. I miss his eyes. His lips.

I started to reminisce about all the good times and I truly miss him.

Now all I feel....is alone.

I called KappaGuy. He couldn't pull himself from Heroes to talk. Thus, the title.


I'm so playing myself with him.
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Weekend ReCap

This weekend was pretty...tame.

Friday Night
I got my hair done. You know, I don't understand beauty parlors. I called at 7 when I got off of work. I asked if she were busy and she said she had no one. She rushed me because she was thinking of going home. Fair enough.

I get there. There's one person in the chair, another under the dryer and her assistant is sewing a weave.

No Stevie.

I asked her assistant where she went.

She went out. Umm ok. She was gone for about 20 minutes. I needed to get a relaxer, my hair washed and a trim. Why not relax my hair and wash it, so I can spend the mandatory hour under the dryer, so when she comes back all she has to do is trim and flat iron my hair?

No. I wait.

This instance wasn't bad. I spent 3 hours in the salon but there have been instances where I've spent 8 hours in the salon. *sigh*

I decided to buy a small bottle opf Bacardi. $11. Do you know I got a half a block before the shit fell out of my bag and broke in half.

I woke up around 11:30. Got my nails done and a pedicure. Went shopping and spent too much money.

Decided I needed to shake my money maker.

To be continued
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Friday, September 19, 2008

appeasing the masses!

I have refrained from posting this week due to the emotional wreck I’ve been thanks to good ole Mother Nature – the itch with a ‘b’.

Oddly enough, I can’t remember the things that have happened this week.
Besides the miscellaneous emotional stuff, I know that I want someone in my life. I’ve been flip-flopping back and forth and I think I do want a relationship. It’s getting cold, I need someone to hold me.

Kappa Guy offered.

He hit me up outta the blue last night, claiming he was experiencing insomnia. He’s a good guy in a lot of ways and I can’t remember if I villianized him or if he was really an asshole. All attempts he made at being sexy or flirtatious were kindly shot down. He said I was being defensive, so I backed up to give him so air. He says he wants to cuddle. Who knows…

I know that I don’t want to sleep around. I mean, really, what is the point? I want the good stuff and I don’t think messing with random strangers is a good way of getting it. It’s like digging random holes in Texas. You might find oil, but how many ditches have you dug before you strike gold? SO, we’ll see.

BFF is gaga over this new dude who seems pretty cool.

I’ve been feeling really itchy at work. Like…itching to go home, itching to go upside my boss’ head, itching to ask him wtf he does all day, itching to move the eff on….

Fall is here and I’m snuggled in a sweater. I loves it! I need some baad boots, but can I really do a 4inch boot all day long? We’ll see….My ankles aint what they used to be. Lol
I need to upgrade my wardrobe. STAT!

That’s all for now…
Don’t really feel bloggin…arrgh

Monday, September 15, 2008


And I was determined to go. It was supposed to start at 5. I got there at 6. People were waiting outside. It was so unorganized. No one was even collecting money. They were thinking 8ish. I couldn't stand on a line waiting for the doors to open. It just so happens, I saw a friend inside. He convinced me to come in. He gave me a chair and I was chit chatting with some ladies.

Yada Yada Yada.

I got robbed of my of the year win. It went to some chick that hasn't competed all year.


Whatever, I decided to compete that night anyway. Through the pain and all.
I had to compete against this gorgeous girl from Atlanta.

I won.

It was not going down....

Did I mention I gave my mother $50 I didn't have...and I made it right back and then a little bit extra.

It would've been more but I had to split the prize with my sis.

I went home, a little pissed.
Saturday night/Sunday afternoon.
I opened a can of tuna and drained it. I ate a little. It was watery and nasty. I added mayon, onions, and scallions. A little paprika and I was missing another ingredient. I couldn't find the damn recipe. I went to the store and it felt like it was literally opening the can. I pricked myself on the ragged edges of the can.

Mind you, I HATE HATE HATE tuna! I hate things where the main ingredient congealing everything together is mayo. I don't like potato salad, egg or chicken salad, and coleslaw. Digusting.

But you know what they say about dreaming about fish.....

I had a dream last night.
I was carrying my AC around with me all over town.
Every bus I got on, there was a slot for me to push my AC in. I was on this long ass journey and I had to travel by bus. Along the way, it was stolen and then another bus rolled up with gourmet cheese.


to be continued

Public Transportation is a Hazard + For the Love of Ben Gay+ White People's Curiosity + Coming Out on Top + Dreaming About Tuna and Air Conditioners

So...by the title, I've had a busy weekend.

Firstly, Friday night, it was raining lightly and I decided to just take the bus home from Downtown Brooklyn. The bus takes me directly across the street from home.

I got on the bus at 9:30. Its a half-hr ride home.

As we're rolling, an older lady gets on the bus, pays $1 and says its because she's disabled or elderly. The bus driver asks for ID. Her drunk grandson starts yelling and screaming that the bus driver always asks her to do it. He refuses to let her show the ID. Fine. The bus driver asks him to sit down.

He gets even more upset. He's yelling and screaming even more.

All of a sudden, he swings and hits the bus driver as we're moving! And to top it off, we were approaching Atlantic Avenue...one of the busiest intersections in BK. The bus driver stands up, his foot on the brake and proceeds to hit back - beating the man's ass. The driver is about 6"2, 250 lbs. The drunk was 5"9, maybe 160. Ummmm...yea.

And...assaulting an MTA Employee is a felony in NYC. He could get up to 7 yrs in prison.

After that, the driver apologized to us for losing his cool. He asked the drunk to get off the bus. He refused. The driver called the police. We had to wait for another bus to come. I got home at 11pm.

When I was in college, I played Rugby. It was hardcore. It got me into pretty good shape. One game, this mammoth of a woman tackled me. Hard. I was fine. I got up off the ground and played the rest of the game. We lost the game.

The next day, I woke up late for my Philosophy final to find I couldn't move. Terrified, it took me like an hour to muster the strength. I walked, or rather, hobbled across campus to the closest thing to a drug store. They had nothing for back pain but I was advised to put a hot water bottle on it and I would be fine. That's exactly what I did. I laid on it for the full day and I was fine.

I got a C in Philosophy....:(

Anywho, Saturday morning, I woke up and boom! I couldn't move. Fuck. Except it was worse and the hot water bottle wasn't working. I had a ball to go to.

...To be continued...
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Friday, September 12, 2008

Parenting...on the Subway

I was on the train this morning and I saw this [black] lady with a little kid who was no more than 2 years old. 2 is being generous in the age department. The kid wanted candy. She didn’t have any. He cried.

She was screaming at the kid, “Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. I’m going to choke the fuck outta your ass.”


I immediately walked away.

This [white] dude came and was like. “I’m gonna choke the fuck outta your ass. He’s a child.”

[Black] dude chimed in and was like, “Yo, don’t say shit to her.”

She was like, “Yo son, you don’t want it. This is mine. This is mine.”

[White] dude was like, “He’s a child.”

He started singing a lullaby and the kid quieted. The lady was like “You so fucking spoiled.”

I just shook my head.

I know it is not my place to tell a mother how to raise her child. But, that was serious. I don’t like stepping in on situations like that because the person who tries to intervene is always the one getting jumped on. But…come on! And think it…when no ones around she probably does worse.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Delicate Balance

I've learned like most things, it is hard to strike that balance. I need to find that within myself.

I want to be tough on bullshit but soft at heart.
I want to be respected at work and taken seriously but known as being able to let my hair down.
I want to be in the ball scene but have a well-adjusted hetero relationship.
I want to be coy and send signals that "hey, great guy, DATE ME" but I'm not a slut.

Is this possible?

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Tuesday, September 9, 2008


So, it works, but it's a little delayed...like a day late...

I dunno if you guys want to subscribe.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Subscribe Me!

I think all of you folks in the blogosphere should have a subscribe me link on your page. It's hard for me to check all your blogs out at work since my desk sits in a high traffic area. People walk behind my back all day.

So, let me be the first.

Subscribe me and be e-mailed everytime I post.

Like cyberstalking but much more convenient, eh?

I don't know how to put this on. Any tech-y people out there that do?

Fool Me Once...Fool Me Twice...

I decided to post another ad on CraigsList to hunt for dates.

I know. I know.

it came out a little more desperate than I anticipated.

But, I decided to put what I wanted which is a decent man who wants a friendship with a woman who will put out if the chemistry is right.

Surprise! Surprise! Not a lot of e-mails. However, I thought one guy was cool. We e-mailed back and forth. He had personality. He was funny. So, I decided on a date. A movie. Casual. Relaxed.

Firstly, he told me he was 5ft9. I'm 5"1' and I decided on 2inch heels...I thought I saw him as he called me to tell me he was there. He lied and said it wasn't him. Then, he saw me and it was. I guess he wanted to see me in person, first. But then, he stands next to me and we're looking eye to eye. What?

I looked soo fly. One dude called me delicious. Lol. I just got a new 16inch weave. I had a little makeup on - just liquid eyeliner on my top lid and shimmery lip gloss. I had a bubble dress on that I cinched in the waist with a skinny belt. Hot.

We went to see the movie. Made small talk. We talked about the election. He said he hadn't been following it. He was a Republican. and he wasn't sure if he was going to vote or not. *blank stare*

Did I mention: he's 28.

He shouldn't vote. Asshole.

I wanted to leave but I really want to see the movie. Traitor with Don Cheadle.

He was trying to talk to me during the movie. He grabbed my hand and was digging his nails under mine. Weird. He said my hands were soft. He said things look like they come to me easily. I laughed like, I wish. His breath smelled like old people's breath, reminding me of moth balls or some shit.

After we left the movie, his phone kept going off. I told him he should just answer it. He said no. He was like I'm surprised your phone isn't going off.
I know you got like 6 dudes in the wings. What number am I?

Eh. I was like...don't go there.

He wanted to get something to eat. I wanted to run far away. I had my umbrella. It was a light rain but I spent too much on my 'do to eff it up. He said my umbrella was too small. He put his arm around me and told me to get under his. It was mad uncomfortable because I had to crouch down. After a block, I had to stand straight. As I'm pulling away, he tried to pull me to him to kiss him.

I was like, "What are you doing?"
He asked, "Oh, you're a good girl, you don't kiss on the first date?"
I nodded.

He kept asking me if I were hungry and I kept dodging the question. I said I was thirsty and tired. We went to Duane Reade (only thing open) and got juices and then decided to take the bus home.

Another half hour I told myself. He kept talking. I was half-listening, half-wishing the bus would go faster. He kept touching me. He was running his fingers up and down the tattoo on my spine. He kept touching my knee. He kept his arm around me. I thought my body language was enough for him to get the point. I was mad stiff. At one point, I was like...Can you stop touching me, please?

I was so skeeved out.

It was finally time for him to go. He wanted a hug. I gave him a half-pat. He looked me dead in the eye. I hope to see you again. I smiled.

He called me like 2x to make sure I was home, safely. I texted him that I was fine.

One other quirk: he kept saying, "Can you blame me? After every other sentence....ugh!

I had a funny thought as I got home. I said...at least I have something to blog about. And see..I do it for your entertainment. Can you blame me?

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Thursday, September 4, 2008

On Dating BiSexual Men

For some reason...bisexual men love me. I don't know why.

There have been a few instances where I really thought about it but never followed through.

1. I was just getting into the pageants (about 3 years ago) and it was this sexy guy always talking to me. Dude was the TRUTH. A little on the shorter side, but he had a full rack of abs, the v-cut, beautifully sculpted back, humor, street sensibility, and a gorgeous smile. When he hugged me, I felt like silk.

Little did I know, he liked men, women, trannies...everything under the Sun. I saw him a year ago but he lost a lot of weight. Its either drugs or something more sinister. But, lawd...I remember!

2. Lambda. He came to NYC to dance professionally. For the first 2 years of me knowing him, I had no idea he was bi. I really just thought of him as a theatre queen...really hyper and excited about life. One night, I saw him out. He said "Nina, you are so beautiful. I would fuck the shit outta you."

This from a flamboyant gay man.

My first reaction was laughter. But, he was looking me in the eye.

"I'm serious."


"I like girls, too. I just broke up with my girlfriend. Dudes around her way didn't understand how she could be with me like that. But for real, if you ever wanna ya know one night...call me"

*blank stare*

3. Jake! Oh I love me some Jake....he literally has 80% of what I'm looking for in my ideal mate. We have a tentative wedding date of 2/20/2020.

So...maybe that's when I'll take one up on their offer.

But when a man tells you he's bi..you can almost anticipate that's what he's going to say anyway because there's such intensity...raw sexual energy. But to compete with other chicks and dudes....

You fill in the rest.

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Tuesday, September 2, 2008


So...the West Indian Parade came to Brooklyn and I spent it avoiding the crowds as much as possible. However a friend of mine lured me out the house with the promise of rum punch and laughter. I waxed poetic and decided to take flicks for you kids.

I wanted to show how we fuck up our own shit by throwing ridiculous amounts of garbage around.

Gi braved it all the way from the Boogie Down to chill with us.

After asking vendor after vendor for the Bermudian flag to no avail, I decided to be Jafaican and speak with an almost-believable accent.

We got to Billy's house and he greeted us with rum punches and Papa John's.

Billy, of course, is gay. His friends, true to form, are ridiculously cute.

There was one in particular, who was trying to get with BOTH me and Gi.

Oh lawd. My heart rate starts pumping thinking about him. Firstly, his skin is gorgeous. Lips are juicy....His smile is beautiful and his eyes are a grayish brown. I told him I didn't believe they were his and I poked him in the right eye.

He just laughed.

We were oddly familiar with each other for strangers who just met.

Funny, he's friends with Billy, who's gay and he's at home with a house full of gays. Hmmmm...

He said he's bisexual. He was sitting across from Gina who and next to the small as grown man who is a foot shorter than me and less than half my body weight. He's TINY and I'm 5ft tall. He had the nerve to say he was bisexual, too.

Dude! Firstly, he was my complexion with blue contacts. Not to mention, color contacts look a fool on ANY0NE. If you have a pair, throw them out AT ONCE!


But then, he offers to go to Gi's with the other guy...to make the night special.

I said, "My ass....my whole ass..."

That was bold.

As we were leaving, BisexualDude1 gave us a long lasting hug. It solidified in my mind....I need some "real" dudes in my life...but boy, if he didn't make a sista remember she was fine...

Now....I'm a thick girl. And...I know how to work my assets. And I believe in showing off the best parts of yourself. So, I have legs..breasts, and an ok waist. I didn't want to put myself out there too much. So, I kept it cute with a lil mini mini skirt and a cute shirt. The skirt is 14 inches long. Pull out your ruler and measure the length of your waist to your hips. The skirt just barely covered my ass.

But, it was Labor Day and I never wear scandalous shit and if chicks can walk around in bikinis with feathers and beads...eff it.

I heard so many catcalls...

Here are the best ones:

You wore that just for me.

You need a roommate (---errrp)

Ay, Empress, come 'ere tick gal

Girl, you look healthier than a motha---. I'd eat it up and beat it up all night.

The last one had me thinking......
And the first thought was...really? Let's go right now. Because not for nothing, the last 2 guys that said they could do all this shit to me...1 was so small, I wanted to cry and the other was done in 3 pumps....so spare me....

He just kept going on and on. I wasn't even mad, I laughed in his face.

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Arrgh Moments +Jafaican + BiSexual Boys + Connolingus in the Street & Body Consciousness

Let me just say this weekend was kind of bananas....

I really needed a long weekend away from work. I feel like my nose is flat because its been held to the grindstone.

So...it was kind of run of the mill. I had to work 4 hours on Saturday. Twin owed me $100. He won his category in the ball last week and he got paid in $50 V.isa giftc.ards. So he gave me one. I took that with me to the grocery store knowing that ReluctantRoomie had left some money on the table for me.

(I haven't blogged about RR but basically: he's 19 yrs old. He's gay from Rochester. He's out here for school and he had no where to stay when school was over. He'd just landed a job. He said he could save for a month and be out. So, I said he could stay with me. Knowing how hard it is to live in NYC, I knew he would need longer than a month. I told him the 1st month would be free. After that, his contribution would be $100. His first month was over 08/15...the day of his first meaty paycheck. Yet, nothing was left for me. We had a talk. He promised he would have something for me this week. I call him RR because I don't want him living with me.)

I get up to the cash register. My items total to $54. I take off 1 thing. $49.62. I tell the cashier I have a credit card. She says she needs to see I.D. Its not in my wallet....which is another story altogether. I say I don't have it. She starts shaking her head 'no.' I try to explain. She's not hearing it. I use my debit card. It gets declined. There's a line forming behind me. The bagboy looks pissed. She calls the manager. I feel like the entire store is looking at me.


I show her the giftcard. She goes "ooooooh." I go, "That's what I was trying to tell you."

I swipe.


Also...let me interject that their system is old. It takes a good 3 minutes of waiting before it authorizes or declines.


I step to the side. The manager says, "Ay mami. No money?"

I give him a nasty look. I'm pissed.

I call my bank first. My balance is $41.XX.
I call Twin. He said he used his fine. He advises me to call the number on the back of the card.

Stupid V.isa takes a maintenance fee. So, the card was no $50. It was $47.50. I wanted to cuss someone.

I had to wait for the cashier to take care of the line. I took off 2 items...$46.75.

I swipe.


Thank Goodness!

My cheeks were burning. My neck was tingling. It was horrible.

I hail a cab with all of my bags. The fuckin cab driver saw me struggling. He didn't have the decency to help me.
He gets me to where I'm going, 5 blocks away. Charges me $7. Turns around. Starts smiling in my face.

"You cooking tonight, sweetheart?"

"Give me my change."

I struggle to get my bags out of his car.

He drives off.

My neighbor who is like 70 yrs old hears me call him an asshole.

"Ok, Nina-darling," she said in her thick Carribean accent. She chuckled...

To be continued...
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