So, we set out to the village. On the ride there, I kept making eyes at this guy who sat across from us. IDK. He was so intriguing to me. He had on this red, black and green headwrap over his locs. He had spike chains on and these big combat boots. He also had on leather gloves and a khaki colored trenchcoat. It was like he was an afro-goth. Twin and I got off the train. As we got up to get off, he got up too. He was like 6"3. Twin 6". I felt like a dwarf standing between the two. I thought he was going to get off with us. He didn't. I told Twin that if he had, I'd be worried. We got off at West 4th St...the known gay spot. He said. If he did you should've been worried anyway because he was crazy. He said I need to get laid or something because my raging hormones are effing with my judgment.
All we did all night was walk around. We walked from the West Village to the East Village to SoHo. We walked for like 2.5 hours. I enjoyed it although my feet were killing me. We wanted to go to Gonzales and Gonzales..which kind of like one step up from Chipotle. We got turned away at the door for wearing sneakers. Twin was upset. I laughed it off.
As we were riding home, we saw the two most gorgeous black dudes on the train. One had on a button down shirt. No jacket. Dude, it was like 40 degrees outside. He had a swaggerific walk where it didn't even matter.
This guy came on the train and sang. It was apparent that something was off. I gave him a dollar. After I did, he said "Keep Jesus first, haha" with the most creepy laugh. It was weird. Twin was like.."That man was on drugs." in the TV after school special voice. I just cracked up.
I had such a good time and only spent $3 the whole night. Sa-weeeeeeeet!
Saturday night, I went to Brooklyn Museum First Saturdays with Wynsters the Tigress. We went early and watched Purple Rain. OH EM GEE. Purple Rain was hor-ri-ble. We laughed throughout....it was so bad it was good. That's the only way I can describe it. I will say that it gave me a whole new respect for Prince and the live music experience. I want to go to a concert.
We danced as I ran into a whole bunch of random people that I know from different places. I felt all popular. I ran into. the hey sexy guy from this post. He upgraded to "Hello Gorgeous." I said, "Hey..how are you?" He said..."I'm good. I don't want to hold you up. Your friend is waiting. I'll find you later." So, we proceeded to the dance floor. He passed by me but didn't say anything. I didn't see him after that. What is his deal???? I'm all intrigued because I'm like...why flatter me but then don't take my number. I guess there's always next month. Right?
I saw a guy standing by himself in the corner. Wynsters pushed me to talk to him and I did. We made small talk before my nervousness kicked in and we ran away after I got his number. We danced as I starved Wynsters before we left. It was a good night.
Sunday, I woke up with just enough time to bird bath and ummm....put on the same clothes I wore Saturday night. Nothing scandalous, I sa-wear! I had a dress picked out but it was a turtleneck sweater dress and it was 70 degrees outside. I had a choice: figure something out and be late or wear what I had on the previous night and be on time.
I felt like a hooker the whole time. I wore liquid leggings and knee high flat boots to church. It'll be funny next week..I'm sure. I'm glad I went. I felt all renewed and such. I took the bus home. A few stops after mine this dude gets on the bus. He is f-i-n-e in that pretty boyish way. Light-skinned, hat, light brown eyes...yadda yadda. He's asking for change for the fare. I have it. I try to always bring change becasue I'm schizo and forget my metrocard sometimes. He has a $5 bill and needs singles + change for the bus. I say, I don't have singles but he can just have the fare. He doesn't want to take my money. Although its just $2.25. I don't think anything of it.
I get off the bus, he chases me down to ask for my number. Sweet.
I text him mine because my phone died. He calls me later.
Snippet of the conversation:
Me: How old are you?
Him: 25, you?
Me: 23.
Him: Oh, you're a baby.
Me: How am I a baby?
Him: You just are. Do you still live with your parents?
Me: No, I live alone.
(hmmmm...)
Him: What sign are you?
Me: Aquarius
Him: Oh, that means you are a bad girl.
Me: Excuse me?
Him: Yes...it means you're naughty.
Me: *laughs* OK, if you say so. What's your sign?
Him: Pisces.
Me: Oh GOD!
Him: I hope that's in a good way.
Me: Pisceans are cold blooded. They get what they want and they leave you.
Him: No, baby, I'm a lover.
Me: Ok, I'll take your word for it.
Him: I can show you better than I can tell you.
(I bet.)
Me: So what are you looking for?
Him: Whatever you're looking for. Do you have a bf?
Me: No, do you?
Him: Do I have a bf?
Me: Yes *laughs*
Him: That's not even a question. Hell no, I don't have no bf.
Me: Sorry, you gotta ask these days. Do you have a gf?
Him: I have a friend.
Me: A friend?
Him: Yea, she and I do what we do but I'm not trying to go deeper than that with her. What are you looking for?
(hmmmm....bs meter goes off the charts!)
Me: I'm looking to date.
(I don't remember his response)
What I'm thinking is the signs are all there.
1. Whenever a guy asks you (even in a casual way) who you live with.
2. When he mentions or even alludes to sex
3. When he calls you a bad girl or naughty in some type of way to either make you challenge or confirm it....
all in the first convo...
its a fwb situation he's looking for.
I am so totally NOT with it.
Yes, my hormones are on 10 right now but I can't deal. I don't want to sleep with someone unless a)I know its the real thing..if you know what I mean and b) I won't feel like a big hoe bag the next day. What am I going to get out of it, really? I'll feel like my soul's going to hell and he would've gotten off.
Today, I was thinking about the other dude. I sent him a text.
"Hi N...it's Nina. We met on Saturday. I hope your day is going well. I will speak to you soon. :)"
No response.
I talked to Twin, asking if I should call him. Twin said no.
I did anyway. He didn't pick up. I feel like an idiot for not listening to Twin. We shall see. I'm going to remain hopeful.
INNNNNNNNNNNNN the meantime. I saw Blair on Friday. He looked annoyed when I spoke to him. I want to hump on something so bad. Something meaning someone who is in my top 3 lovers list. Top 3 are: 1) Aussie (not gonna happen) 2) Blair and 3)Dame.
1) Aussie...he was good at everything. He even sucked on my toes! BUT..he's an asshole who cheats.
2) Blair....I'm sure that I'm the last girl on his list of people to eff. I don't like the situation in the least.
3) Dame...I haven't spoken to him in maybe a year and a half. I miss him because he loved my body. Even my belly. He would umm...go downtown until I made him stop. He's older. As in 40+ so his stamina is not what it used to be and he can't go all night. Not like I want someone to. But, if I do..I need someone who is going to be up for it. However, he is attentive. I did things with him, I've never done before and probably wouldn't do with anyone else unless they put a ring on it. Not crazy things..just stuff like letting him tie me up..hehe
Funny how these were the last 3 people I slept with in chronological order from soonest to oldest. The next person I sex has to do what they do and better. I just really want some goooood sex. The kind that makes you grab on to the sheets begging them to stop but not really wanting to. The kind that after, you can't move because all of your energy has been expended. The kind where you feel flushed all over. You know...I want sex like how I want my politicians reliable and dirty. hahahaha
Maybe I've said too much.
Sorry for the long post.
Besos!
2 comments:
Those are the hormones talking! You've been doing so great, you def don't want to give it to Mr."I have a FRIEND!"
I'm so proud of you!! Keep up the holding out!
I enjoyed this peek into your experience; you're reflective and that's so good.
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