I'm Alive!!

Tomorrow is my last day in Bermuda.

Wow.

Before this trip, I was really anxious. I had myself convinced I wouldn't make it here...you know...like SOMETHING would happen where I couldn't come. (crazy, yes, I know!)

Anywhosies....
I've got my batteries recharged. I didn't spend all my money. I'm amped to go home and make some shit happen for myself.

I'm about 2 shades darker, my nephew asked me to live here and help out his wife in her salon. I'm leaving with a plan of action. I'm happy. I'm focused. I'm ready to attack.

My end game is to have stores/clients in different cities. I have a feeling NYC will always be my home-base but I want to try and work/see/visit/live in as many places as I can. Luckily, my profession allows that.

With living in Bermuda...it is entirely different from living in NYC where the buses don't run regularly. The cost of living is ridiculous (even compared to NYC standards)...my US cell phone costs $2.29 a min to talk on, $0.35 per text. The internet is wack and I don't know anyone NOT related to me. Everyone is either 5+ years older than me or 5+ years younger than me which is weird. Also, BDA is a small town....in an essence where everyone knows your business. I'm sooooo not used to that! I'm projecting to come here possibly by February.

In the meantime, my priorities are:

1. Budget the $$ I Already Have
I need to pay down my debt while investing in acquiring more makeup, my own products and you know, eating and such.

2. Make More Money
I need to get investors interested, seek out grants, loans,etc. And...*drumroll please* WORK! I'm torn between getting a job at MAC or really trying to hustle up more freelance jobs. I'll probably settle on doing both. Either way...I need at least $2500 by August and then another $3000 by October to be able to be in London comfortably.

3. Being Healthy
The family curse is kidney disease on my father's side. All my sisters have it. My father died from it. On my mother's side, diabetes and hypertension. (Damn, can you tell I'm black?) My sisters basically told me...its just a matter of time before my ship comes in so I need to be proactive with my diet, lose some weight and just do better.
I need some health insurance!

So, I need to juggle all this stuff, church, friends and find love?? (Lol)

Speaking of love, I feel like I've been looking in all the wrong places. While out with my wild sister (lol), the men treat me differently. Honestly, while here, I haven't worn heels, I haven't had on tight tight clothes, I didn't even TRY with makeup..it was basically MAC Honeylust all over my lid and some liquid liner most days and the men gawked, bought me drinks, were shy, smiled, held my hand while meeting me a lil too long and I LOVED it! I mean, yes,island men have a way of getting what they want but don't MOST men? Anywhosies, there's this guy I met at the coffee shop in Brooklyn whom I feel is totally awesome...so awesome that I wrote stupid ass poems abt him (yea, I know, lol) There's something inside of me saying...pursue! Take no prisoners! There's also something else sayin...relax. Jay and Marshall text me while I was here. I text Jay back saying I'm in Bermuda, email me. He never did. I want my $0.35 back! I know what these dudes are about...why am I even wasting my damn time? I think Jay is less of a lost cause than Marshall. We'll see. Each summer, I work my ass off. I guess this one is no different. Other than them, that dude from Chicago, CJ is great but my lifestyle doesn't rock with him. (Notice, Chicago is just not on my list of places to be right now...soon though.)

I'm playing it by ear. I'm open to dating and not much more than that. So, we'll see. 2 1/2 more weeks and I'll be celibate for a year and a half.

With everything added up,
In this moment, I'm happy. :)
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