Tuesday, June 8, 2010


Besides my Awakening (a la Kate Chopin) « yes, I'm a nerd, look it up.

There have been some thinnnngs going on I just haven't spoken about.

Granny is still in rehab. While I was gone, my mom didn't visit her not once. Pissed, is the tip of the iceberg of how I felt. In 10 days, you didn't find the time at all to spend 20 minutes with her...umm, ok. I get back and there are some questions about her care...I need to do some research on. Then, I go to check on her house...her "friend" she gave her keys to to check on her apartment...I swear he had some people living in there. I saw sleeping bags and when I walked in, there was a woman and her daughter eating watching TV with a bed made. He assured me no one was living there. I'm going to swing by tomorrow to see what's what. My granny is known for leaving money around. She has a stash of at least $1k and she's forgetful. If I see the same people there, I'm going to call the cops, take his keys and lay down the law. I don't care if he's old enough to be my grandfather. My granny says she trusts him. They've been friends for 40 years. I don't trust him.

When I came back from Bermuda, Editor was supposed to have done some things to the website, have had a description of what she wanted from me in regards to partnership and when I came back, nothing was done. I was disappointed. I was tired. I came back fired up and ready to work and her not doing anything was like a slap in the face. I felt the weight of all I was doing for her magazine and I was just done. She sent me what she wants of me as far as the mag goes but I'm ready to walk away. I want to be free. She's not talking any money. She doesn't have money. When I left, I talked about all these projects I have with no revenue. This is a passion project but so is my makeup artistry. Something's got to give. We'll see. She's disorganized and not focused. I don't think I want that wagon hitched to mine. I have my own wheels to get turning.

So, yea...I feel like my life is in shambles. (Short version)

I feel stagnant. I know I haven't been back long (not even a week yet) but I intended on hitting the ground running. London will be here any moment and I need to get there. I'm about to grind harder than I was before because there are some things I need to get to. Maybe I might alter the plan a lil bit. Who knows?

Honestly, after thinking this through, I lost my mind for a day with this Aussie stuff. I remember why I was leaving the boys alone. I have work to do...
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