Thursday, February 7, 2008

On Loving Black Men

Hostess started read LH. Then read mine.

Sometimes, I don't think I have the age/wisdom behing me to comment but
I'm gonna anyway....

Growing up, I had my daddy. We were thick as thieves. I had my uncles
who had served in the military, married, and had children. My cousins
who had grown up without their fathers followed their uncles' examples.
All the men on my mom's side of the family have families, houses, and
are gainfully employed. They love their Hennessy on the rocks and their
turkies fried. This is what I grew up knowing. I did have my brother who
hit my mom, another brother that went to jail for rape, that one uncle
who was addicted to drugs and constantly cursing and blacking out at
family functions if he made it.
Even with the scores of gay men in my life...there is Jake, gainfully
employed, has a car, a condo, and has never lead a woman to believe he
was straight while maintaining an alluring air of masulinity that makes
her wish he was. There is Wanda. Gay. Works at a law firm, owns 2 cars,
a house, and takes care of his 2 elderly parents at the age of 28.
Then there is FormerBGF. At 25, he's living off of various men that
choose to give him money and/or shelter. This has been his M.O for the
past 3 years. There is also ThatDude who relies on people for a
haircut/club money. Has been arrested for soliciting in train station
bathrooms, and always has something to say about other people.

I know the two extremes of the black male persona. Enough to know that
the difference is what you allow yourself to become and apply yourself
to. If you choose good things, you will do good things.

I see Obama as I see my uncles on my mom's side of the family.
I see Kilpatrick as my brothers.

I know what the difference is.

Also, I'm only 22 years old. I haven't been put through the ringer in
relationships yet. I still believe my prince will be a chocolate god. I
choose to believe there are more men like my uncles and less like my
brothers. Given the choice between a white women who has no idea what my
life is like and a black man who made it through Harvard without a rap
sheet (the New England racism made me want to cut someone), I'll choose
and have chosen the latter.

Plus, when are we going to have a black anybody who has the chance of
being a viable presidential candidate? Jesse couldn't cut the mustard.
Condi...ummm no....Colin this point, I'd think twice
if Chris Rock or Jay-Z were to run. (Kidding)

I agre with Hostess. There isn't a lot of love when it comes to black
men and women. Damn you, Willie Lynch.


The Breaking Point said...

You had me nodding my head right up until the end. Willie Lynch isn't the culprit. We are.

Nina said...

Yes, I do agree that we are perpetuating this toxic cycle...but it started somewhere. That was my point..not that he is to blame but that he was right.