Thursday, September 10, 2009

Confuzzled

I'm in limbo...not in a comfortable spot professionally.

I literally cried this morning when I got off the phone with a bill collector asking me to pay them $50 a paycheck to pay off a $3,000 credit card debt. That's basically my "food" money. Starving artist...for reals.

I remember when $50 was nothing. It was not even enough to get my hair done. Now...I'm like FIFTY DOLLARS! Lol

*le sigh*

I get dressed and made-up to leave the house and it makes me feel better for a minute although my make-up is diminishing day by day. This lady sitting next to me on the train is staring at me....for like 20 minutes. I look at her, she rolls her eyes. What the fucking fuck? (My favorite line fro StepBrothers)

I guess this post will be everywhere. I really feel like crying today. Not being where you want to be and trying to change it is hard business.

Thinking of a master plan cause ain't nothing but sweat in the palm of my hand.

I believe in God. I believe He helps us but I also believe that we've got to put some motion into it. He doesn't just make it rain (dollars).
I need a Divine Intervention right now.

It could always be worse. I'm not on the street or begging for change on the train. How would that look- full face of make-up begging for change...lol

I'm trying not to fall into a depression. I feel myself sliding into one..fighting fighting fighting...

I have more but ehhhh maybe lateer.
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

4 comments:

Stephen Bess said...

It took me a long time to realize, but I found that tithing or giving back to God that 10% made all the difference in the world. I'm not sure if you practice it, but it definitely works. Also, pray and pray some more. He can definitely make it better, but you're right in that we have to submit to Him. Nice blog. :)

kaligyrl99 said...

OMG, trust you are not the only one feeling the exact same way and trying to find a way to make it through. It was an extremely rough week for me but I am glad that I found your blog today!

You rock and it will get better!

Kali

Trish said...

I'm late but I hope that things began to look a little brighter for you over the weekend.

You're right about God helping us but often times we have to make moves to show that we really want what we say.

MilesPerHour said...

I feel ya. But sometimes faith is all we have to go on.