Thursday, November 15, 2007

...and that's the way the story goes...

BestFriend and I have been going through some trials lately. About a
month ago, she pissed me off over something small, but I decided to pout
and not call her or text her or anything. I was expecting for her to
call me. Why? Because every time we have a falling out, I call her
first. Everytime she and her boyfriend have a falling out, she calls
him...hmmmm....
I was proving a point, but I didn't expect for it to be a month.
Sounds petty...but hey! I'm not perfect.
She txts me today saying that she's been going through a lot lately. She
got fired from her job and now she's in Las Vegas where her boyfriend
lives. I'm kind of torn about the whole thing. I'm sorry she couldn't
call me when she was down and out. But, at the same time, that was her
choice. I've always been there for her. There was nothing to suggest
this time would be different even if we were on the outs. But...she
allows herself to be manipulated time and time again by her boyfriend.
Its like nothing gets through to her. I found myself constantly fighting
against him for her to truly look at herself in the mirror and see how
strong and beautiful she is. Then, he comes in when she is vulnerable
and bam! She's in Vegas with him: jobless, carless, and friendless.
Right where he wants her to be. I love her. She's the closest thing to a
sister I have in this world, but I don't know if I can be that for her
anymore. a friend of mine said to me that I'm the type to leave anyone
without the slightest glance back...maybe he's right. She called my mom
to ask her about me. My response to her was...BF needs to find herself.
It sounds cliche but...its true. She needs to build on her character,
her esteem, her true goals in life...I'm not sure what my next step with
her will be. Its really a situation where I can't help her. I have my
own issues. Sounds heartless...but how can I see you clearly when I
can't even see myself....

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