Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Chasing the Big O + Growing Up is like Mold + Sunny Dispositions + Summer Fun in the Sun

Reading the archives of Young Woman on Journey had me really thinking about relationships, sex, life, etc.

Her blog about black women not wanting to masturbate struck me. Out of the group of 4: me, LP, Gi, and BFF...all of them but me own a sex toy. I had a tongue toy but I didn't like it, so I "own" one but it doesn't work technically and literally. My friends and I discuss everything...so yea, we talked about it and I don't like for a man to beat it up both when he's eating me out or during penetration. I like long slow licks and strong strokes. I'm no jack rabbit kind of girl. The best was Mr. Phil. Even though we never had sex, his oral was the best bar none.

And now, I have a confession to make: I've never had an orgasm that I didn't give myself. Then, it was clitoral and not vaginal.

I know. Sad.

But still, I loved sex and all but twice, I liked being with the men I've slept with.

While I'm writing this I'm like DAMN!

But I think I'm ready to get my shit together. I'm ready to buy a toy and just go...see what gets me going and find my "O."

I've been chasing it long enough.
I feel like I'm going through some type of awakening. Each and every day I'm learning something more about myself and I'm loving it.

Is there a such thing as feeling yourself mature?


I'm determined to make this summer fun. I have planned and planned many outings in my head and can't wait for them to come to fruition.

I don't know how long I'll be friends with LP. She's really negative and I can't take it.

to be continued...


Young woman on a journey said...

I'm glad i could be a source of inspiration! lol. no really, its so important to find your own "O"! I garuntee it'll make sex overall better! a lot of people invest in some expensive toy. I say, for your first one, start small and work your way up. you have to figure out what does it for you. I'm more of an erotic literature kinda gal.

there is such a thing as maturing. sometimes, you have these epiphanies, and you find yourself reacting to situations differently. and then you know you've grown! good luck on the journey girl! its scary but exciting.

Hmm...negative friends. well, i'll say not to completely abandon her, cause she probably is in need of positivity and that is why she's around. but you have to make sure her negativity doesn't affect you. learn how to control the conversations you have and to always point out the bright things. she may get annoyed and push you away or she may start to look at things differently. it never hurts to be a friend and usually people are just going through something.

jirzygurl said...

i don't think that is too uncommon. i know a few girls like that... hell i was like that for years... i think til i was like 23- 24 ish.

jirzygurl said...

and girl thanks for the offer to cut a n-word... i will keep that in mind in case i need your services!! and i stays (yes stays) with the sneaks and vaseline so you let me know if i can ever be of assistance! LOL!

Chris said...

Honestly, the emotional bond is it for me...I know I'm a guy, but if I don't have that, I can't do it. I'll just eventually stop without, ummm, arriving...so trust me, I understand.

Yeah, y'all are complex; you need the bond, passion, patience, and it has to be steady...consistant.

Nina said...

Hey Chris.

Thanks for coming back to my spot.

You all are correct. Ummm...I'll venture out to the stores this weekend and we'll see from there.

Jane said...

Yeah you have to explore you. It's yours! Men do it all the time! My older sister took me to the adult store when I was about 21... It was a hilarious experience but it really opened my eyes as far as what I wanted my partner to do to me....

as far as never reaching the *O with a guy! *You've tried being on top with your chest as close to possible? * or him on top with your hips tilted up towards him? * or in a sitting position with your legs wrapped around his back?