A. I wish I could recoup some of that
B. It was money well spent.
The photo shoot yesterday went well but it was 3 hours of work and they only gave me $45. Yes, 3 for the price of 1. Awesome..*sarcasm*
In exchange for that, I was supposed to see a man about a horse or a woman about a make-up counter job. The woman assured me that I'd get it. I wasted 2 hours of my life to go there and I didn't get it. I can't do individual lashes or eyebrows and so....those were deal breakers....I go home and I feel like a loser.
I cry. The tears were slow and deliberate. I just felt like I've been trying so much to no avail. Self-pity is a motha....
A nap will make me feel better. Yes? Hmmmm...
I get up in enough time to be late for work. Awesome! I awake to text messages from BFF asking how the interview was..then, going off with random expletives...then, demanding we get drinks after I get off work. Frankly, I don't want to do it. I have my own stuff going on. I'm really really sad and unsure of whether or not I will be eating cat food next week. Money is so funny and that's no joke. I agree. She won't tell me what's the matter.
I get to work and am just trying to relax. I go on Twitter and Afroman has announced L is pregnant!
(Brief history: I've loved Afroman since freshman year of high school, 10 years ago. We were off and on but serious until 2 years ago who he moved in with L. She's the woman he left me for, denies leaving me for her and has tried to get in my pants since by telling me they're not together, succeeding once in November. The last time I saw him was Memorial Day. He told me hey weren't together. I told him I was being celibate til marriage. Yup, in an essence....that's him)
I immediately start crying. It hurts. I tell Gi on FB chat. She says he's not worth my tears. I can't help it. I know there's no possible way we would ever be together. That is more than evident if she wasn't in the picture. I just can't shake the feeling of extreme sadness. I feel as though Mr. T slapped me.
How does MAC factor in? Well, I'm wearing their eye liner and through all the tears, it hasn't budged...a small sliver of light.
Drinks with BFF....let's see what her problems are that she has to tell me in person after a long day...if its stupid, I'm going OFF.
I just can't deal.
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