Still Feeling Like Mold

And I hope it passes soon.

I always thought of myself as an optimistic person and I've been faking it so my friends don't REALLY know how upset I am.

But, alas, here is where I can show my true emotions without reproach, right?

*sigh*

I stupidly left my ipod at work. On my desk behind my computer screen. Someone stole it.

Great!

I found another one on craigslist for $85.

However, a friend needed to borrow $50 for the week and Christmas is RIGHT HERE.

I had a novel idea.
Get my mom to buy it for me. :-)

Right? Wrong!

I called her and asked her if she bought me a gift yet. She said that she had. I said oh...well, someone stole my ipod and I found another one for $85.

She snapped on me, "Nina, Christmas is not like that this year. No one has money like that."

Let me rewind you guys back one week ago. She asked me about Christmas. I said that no one was really getting gifts from me. We're in a recession.

"Well, I'm not just anyone. I'm your mother and I want a gift."

"What do you want?"

"A gold necklace with a cross pendant."

"What?"

"You always do for your friends. That's what I want. You should do for me."

"Ok."

But I was fuckin pissed.
Especially in that moment, because I had just priced a necklace and the most conservative one was $75. I ended up getting a very nice one for $120.

Begrudgingly.

BFF said if I were going to do it without the true spirit of giving, then I shouldn't have done it. She's right. But, if above everyone else, she doesn't understand that times are hard for a young woman on her own, then where does that leave me?

I feel like throwing the shit at her.

Merry Fuckin Christmas!

I really just want a vacation from life. Just not dealing well.
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