With Every Heartbeat

You have been circling in my mind constantly, selfishly encompassing my thoughts, I remember -

Words said. Promises unspoken.

Did I imagine a life not possible?

Perhaps. I wish for you. I mean, wished for you. A constant reminder that decency and righteousness does exist in a man, Mr. Wise.

And, I remembered your music. Your one true passion. And I remembered King and Janus. And I knew you were there. Nestled between sugary sweet notes. A child's playground at times.
My.sp.ace.

And I searched for you. And with the input of your name, you were there. First person, first page.

You were always able to separate yourself from the rest.

My heart stopped for a moment. Should I listen to your words?

I had to- I listened to you speak of politics and baby mama drama. I saw pictures of the woman you hold queen and the child you fathered. Once upon a time, I wanted that to be me.

And I gazed upon your lips and eyes and hair matted into locs you once cut off as a sacrament of faith to God.

And I missed you instantaneously. I missed your distinct, your genius wordplay.

And I remember rainy nights spent on the phone, your spontaneous trips to NY, poetic cypher blazing between us. Intimacy in words.

I miss you.

For a moment ago, I lost a friend.
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