She was shocked to say the least. She was like, "You used to flinch when you heard the name 'Jesus' and you went to church? Praise God! I know it was because you were hurt. God is good."
We talked further and she told me about her sacrifice for lent: no facebook, myspace, tv, internet-surfing, blogs, alcohol or bread.
We talked about church and the difference between when we were 17 and now. She talked about her walk with God and its funny how we're both going in the same direction, although she's further than me, I think.
I told her that I think we have similar problems. BFF, by nature, is very extreme - she's all or nothing, like for real. If she's in church, she's in nothing but. If she's not, she's committing all the sins..lol(I kid..she's not killing or stealing, practicing beastiality or homosexuality..but you get what I mean...). That was kinda my impression. The more I grow, the more I realize the true nature of deception.
The church I went to growing up was very surface. The outer man looked very catechised in the wisdom of the doctrine. The inner man was still very much unscathed. Everyone wore their sanctity on their sleeve.
So, I grew up thinking to be godly, I had to have the skirts to the ankle and shout and dance when I was really just praying to get out of my heels.
I ran into BFF on our way to work one day and she was like...you're glamorous at 8 o'clock in the morning. Ugh! I can't stand you. I don't know what the conventional thoughts of glamour surround, but I wasn't trying. I will say that if I subscribed to the doctrine of some churches that say you can't have a perm, wear make-up, only opaque stockings..I would be miserable. I am quite aware that the image you project affects the people around you and while I could have God in my heart and I wear a mini skirt with 5 inch heels, God will not be the first thing a man sees in me when he looks at me. But, Liz and I were talking last week and a point came up that man has used the Bible to enslave people, genders, and pretty much whatever people have wanted it to mean. It is a lie. Love of Christ is about freedom from sin and redemption from the dark and ugly things we do.
I suppose, there will be a lot more posts like this in the future with me just thinking and meditating. I'm re-reading parts of the Bible because I really want to change from the inside out. My outer-man is ok but my inner-man was dying and it was spilling out all over this blog.
This morning, I read Galatians 5 with the fruits of the flesh and the fruits of the spirit. Give it a gander. Lol. Actually, BFF read it to me at midnight and I was half-sleep. I woke up really wanting to read it again.
16 So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. 17 For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. 19 The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery 20 Idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 And envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness 23 Gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. (NIV) —Galatians 5:16-23
I'm definitely a work in progress....just dealing with my fits of rage alone...lol
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